So I was a bad Idol blogger this week, but, trust me, this was not the greatest week in Idol history, so I don’t feel that bad. This week, I’m joined by Katie and Chris. Amy and Mike were delinquents this week and “Randy” has quit/disappeared despite begging to participate in the first place. Anyway, if you’d like to join the panel, there’s an opening. Just ping me!
Jacksonville
Joshua Ulloa was good when he was just singing, but I didn’t appreciate the antics or sound effects. He kind of reminded me of an inbred Gotti brother. Katie was not a fan and “would have said no when everyone on the panel said yes.” Chris says “the comparison to Justin [Guarini] is a given” but thinks he “may be a little too ‘street’ to get past the top 12.”
Sharon Wilbur wasn’t bad, but a little breathy for my taste. I hope she doesn’t make it far. Katie “thought she would be very gimmicky when she strutted in with the dog, but her voice wasn’t all that terrible.” Chris wants Sharon to rush to voice lessons “Needs to get voice lessons QUICKLY to strengthen her voice. I could her the frailty just in the little 20-second piece she did. The raspiness sounded delicate and frail. She’ll have major stamina issues if she doesn’t fix it quick.”
At this point in the show, I’m wondering why Kara doesn’t ever seem to want to wear a full shirt.
My DVR cut out on Kaneswesa Finnie, but judging from the comments, I’m grateful. Katie asks “Really? Do we need to drag the mom into the room and make the humiliation worse? She was not as untalented as so many others we’ve seen. That was just cruel.”
Julissa Veloz is a total oddball and kind of reminds me of Paula, but at least she can sing a bit. Katie appreciated the whole package: “any girl who has the guts to sing Whitney and wears cute yellow heels gets my vote.” Chris approved of Julissa, but not the judges: “Great vibrato and control. Thought it was unfair for the judges to pick on her goofy laugh, since she won’t be laughing on her solo album while she’s singing.” Although I still don’t know what Paula was freaking out about. What happened?
Darin Darnell was painful and broke a major Karen rule: thou shalt not butcher a Boyz II Men song.
Jasmine Murray needs to be cast in a Disney movie pronto, but Chris points out that she is not the strongest singer: “Very flat. Choosing the Fergie song was an awful choice for her since there aren’t any edges to that song. She stays on key, but I wasn’t impressed.”
Anne Marie Boskovich is beautiful and I LOVE her voice. We met her for a second and then Simon sent her off and told her to come back dressed like a star. From what I saw, she added eyeliner and took off her jacket. Katie says “she has a good voice and I couldn’t help but smile when she was singing. I don’t know how much of that had to do with her song choice (“Bubbly”) or with her voice, but I’ll take it.” Anne Marie is Chris’s insta-favorite: “She is my pick for the best that Jacksonville had to offer. Powerful, natural voice with good solidly placed vibrato. Incredible control. She’s in the Top 8 for sure. Minus the inevitable name change.” Oooh, sounds like another case of “Come On Irene” syndrome.
T.K. Hash needs to come over to my house and serenade me. Also, rather risky singing an Archuleta signature song, but he did well. Katie was a fan from the start: “He only needed to sing a few words and he had me.” Chris was glad he made it through: “Simon still voted No, but got outvoted which is good, because he is very strong.”
Michael Perrelli reminds me of Jason Castro (and you know what that means). Not terrible, but seriously, does he really think he’s a star? Also, I can’t stand the crying. Katie is 100% in agreement “Unless he was auditioning for High School Musical 4, I say no. I’m so tired of people crying at the auditions. Maybe crying should automatically disqualify you.”
Salt Lake City
First up, it’s an Osmond! Katie says: “David Osmond, son of Alan Osmond of the Osmond Brothers: It’s so incredibly tragic that he and his dad both have spent time in wheelchairs. He’s definitely got a great voice–and I’m happy to see him getting his ticket to Hollywood. Kara commented that he’s “so genuine,” and I got the same impression.” I liked his voice and was touched by his story, but let the record show I’m totally anti-soul patch.
Tara Mathews “said you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but when you dress like that, you’re just asking for it.” (Thanks, Katie. I wrote down the quote, but didn’t know who had said it.)
Chris Kirkham came with a big bunny; honestly, he was far better than the guys with gimmicks usually are.
Frankie Jordan has a nice voice, but seeing someone so Amy Winehouse-esque with a kid kept making me think about how Amy should be sterilized. Katie says, “she’s got to be the cutest stay-at-home mom, I’ve ever seen.”
Meghan Corkrey’s song choice surprised me, but I liked her. I think she could do very well. Katie liked her arrangement: “Puts her ahead of the crowd in a big, big way. I was almost even able to forgive her for the sleeve tattoo.”
Andrew Gibson was apparently bad, but I just never got past the fact that he reminded me of this weirdo family friend of ours.
Austin Sisneros is Senior Class President (just like me!) and says he’s auditioning to inspire people (puke!) That said, it’s really tough to judge him based on his truly bizarre song choice (Raffi? Really?) Austin also sent Katie on a love/hate roller coaster ride: “’I’m auditioning today to inspire people.’ Gag me. On the other hand, I do LOVE the song he sang by Train. He gets mad points for that in my book. Then he busted out the “It Takes a Village” song, and I instantly thought of Hillary Clinton. Now he’s out in my book.
So the minute I saw Taylor Vaifanua I thought, “poor thing looks like a tranny.” Katie noticed her height too: “Freakishly tall! She’s beautiful and won the judges over with a church song.” And then I found out she was only 16 and felt terrible about thinking that. But I need to be honest with all of you. Anyway, she used Lauryn Hill’s arrangement of the opening of “Joyful, Joyful” from Sister Act 2 and I would hope you all know how I feel about Sister Act 2 by now.
Rose Flack brought out Katie’s inner compassionate conservative: “What an incredibly tragic story. Don’t let my Republican friends know, but I kind of loved her voice. I’m looking forward to seeing if her cool, hippie style will translate in the competition when there are other styles thrown at her. “ In my opinion, she needs to wash her disgusting feet and start wearing shoes, but she had a cool voice. She’ll either make it to the top 12 or turn out to be a one-trick, dirty pony and get the boot early on.
New York and San Juan
It switched back and forth and I have no clue who was from where. Honestly.
With Jorge Nunez, I was pleasantly surprised.
The minute I see Jessika Baier and her chubby family in coordinated hot pink outfits, I know we don’t even need to hear her sing.
Melinda Camille was just average in my opinion; I really hope she gets cut early.
Jackie Tohn… honestly, I wasn’t really feeling her, but maybe she’ll be like Amanda Overmyer and appeal to a very specific target.
Nick Mitchell/Norman Gentle… ummm, are you kidding me?
Kenny Hoffpauer is from Delaware County, so I have to cheer him on.
Monique Garcia Torres with the adorable brother was not good enough in my opinion, but way better than some of the losers who have gone through this season. She’ll be cut right away in Hollywood.
I’m pretty sure Alexis Cohen might be played by Tracey Ullman.
Patricia Lewis Roman didn’t do the best rendition of old school Whitney Houston, but to borrow a Kara-ism, I totally liked her vibe.
So that wraps up auditions! Hollywood for the next two weeks!
